11.24.17 Red Electric Serpent
Started on Neptune 18 degrees Jyestha (Antares) 1st Pada, 10th House Scorpio with Venus 7 degrees Anuradha 2nd pada. . . dawdling with watercolor paints, moving the colors around on paper. Feeling kind of lost and lackluster, here but not here, seen unseen, observant participant, what’s the experience? Unsettled wonky flow . . .
11.25.17 White Self-Exisiting Worldbridger
All these brown numbers and letters and papers, notes symbols patterns, did you know I don’t remember written words even after reading and writing, to recount is mind-blank as far as communicating the written stuff, be it quotes notes patterns news what have you . . . glued these brown paper portions onto the page, along with baby in arms . . . sometimes I feel like I’m experiencing as a baby, just observing, listening, sensing, smelling, seeing the smorgasbord of everything all around me and there’s no mind to it, no thoughts, no feelings, opinions, those are blocked out while the absorption happens and come later, after the ‘experience’ is over-stimulating shuts of thought/feeling in the moment, ties tongue blanks thought . . . almost impassively there not there sensation like I would not be missed were I not in the room yet there I am . . .
11.26.17 Blue Overtone Hand
Motivated to move with what I put out . . . do something with it, some of it, any of it, a bit here, a bit there . . .
Finger played with gouache and a thin paint brush at first then started pulling back out with a brush the green, the scrabble tile shapes, the lady in waiting . . . the baby in arms . .
Then the dates and stamps, the notes, the letters, all the weird word patterns, get them back out there as a ground to build from, maybe I’ll get ‘it’, maybe there’s nothing to ‘get’, just too afraid to be mistaken proudly than proud to have made mistakes so all tensed up in-communication, tongue tied syllables, language patterns, learning to be with as they are already (even when not to my ‘liking’ or ‘imagining’ in the ‘perfect’ manifestation . . .) . . .time tick tocking away, date day year, alpha numerics, rhythmic they go on and on non-stop travelling despite my protests, what am I protesting anyway? lacklustreyness, lack of::vibrance, popping imagery, originality, working with what I’ve got, blaheeblueeness . . . infancy . . . . letting this rest now.
11.27.17 Yellow Rythmic Star
Added hummingbird drawing cut from sketch book, sweet bird of hope and joy and delight, remembrance of devotion with all beings, centred around this::trees::
the giving trees where many creatures make their abode, the giving trees that provide shelter, and word, aleph bet in twigs and branches in between trunks they dance together, giving a place for all creatures to gather, before books made from trees . . .
trees: the original place of word sharing, humans and creatures together, sheltering, communing, in harmony below the boughs, up in the branches, nesting . . . .
Neptune comes along vibrantly in the end!